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Friday, August 19, 2005

The day I spent as a radish

It was a thursday. As good a day as any other, I suppose. I soon discovered that radishes didn't really have any substantial reason to differentiate between different days of the week.

I woke up at the usual time, but as I was getting out of bed, it struck me that I probably shouldn't go to work. After all, what would people say if I showed up as a small, red vegetable? So I went back to sleep and got up at noon, feeling very contented.

Now, brushing my teeth was something of a challenge, seeing as I didn't have any. But sure enough, with a little creative thinking and some elbow grease, I succeeded.

I wasn't very hungry, so I opted for a light breakfast. I was just about to make myself a little salad, when I realized that might not be exactly 'kosher' in my current state, if you know what I mean. In the end I had a bowl of cereal.

Or atleast I tried. Now, I don't know if you've realized this, but radishes don't really have a mouth, as such. In fact, they don't have any limbs or appendages worthy of mention at all. So I had a really hard time of trying to accomplish the relatively simple act of eating a bowl of cereal.

Needless to say, I went without breakfast that day.

The rest of the day was pretty monotonous, mostly just sitting around. The only bit of excitement came later in the evening, when a particularly violent gust of wind nearly managed to dislodge me from my stationary position on the kitchen counter due to the fact that my napiform taproot was balanced quite precariously upon the surface of the counter.

All in all, my day as a member of the Brassicaceae family was a fascinating (if a bit tedious) one, and I was quite relieved when it was over.

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Anonymous Sam said...

Dr. Dna derp de derp. Derp de derpity derpy derp.

Until one day, the derpa derpa derpaderp. Derp de derp da teedily dumb.

From the creators of Der, and Tum Ta Tittaly Tum Ta Too...

Dr. Dna is Da Derp Dee Derp Da Teetley Derpee Derpee Dumb. Rated PG-13.

Blogger dr.dna said...

I agree with that completely.

Blogger Rick Hunter said...

buncha tongue talkers. Good thing I hold the interpretation "in a bank in Beverly Hills."

Anonymous kiq said...

i love you guys :D


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